Friday, February 19, 2010

a little background

When I woke up after falling unconscious in front of the pcpd, I had no idea what a blog was. I had been smoking meth for a few days and was riding bikes at 2pm in a rough neighborhood with a friend. The local police pulled us over for obvious reasons. I was terribly dehydrated and with the nervousness of having a bag of meth in my sock I passed out or blacked out or whatever. It could have been that id just tried to down a beer 5min prior, and after being without sleep for a few days, smoking lots of meth, sweating purfusely and knowing im about to get another charge. Well when I woke up I got a get out of jail because your going to the hospital card.
Ive only stated this because Im astonished how far away from that person I am even though I only live two miles from where this incident occurred. One of many interesting stories someone can create with a little confusion and misdirection. Ive sort of got my act together now in comparison to that day. I havent used drugs or alcohol in about 3 and half years, am in college for counseling and human services, and sometimes will lead a meditation group at a local buddhist temple. Where I once broke in to houses, I now break out of self destruction and break in to deep insights.
I believe that anyone can make some sort of positive change in their life regardless of the situation. If you are in a codependent relationship, you can learn a few things about your own thinking patterns through your own exploration that may seem very subtle, but can change the way you think forever. And I absolutely do not mean help you learn something about yourself you can remember and use forever. I really mean something you can learn, remember and NOTICE forever. Ive discovered little things buried in my thoughts or feelings that have really changed things some what permanently. If you too were or even are an everyday meth addict, and you are still there enough to read a blog, or even read for that matter, there are things you can do to better your situation in the way you want to.
Im not trying to tell anyone that they should not use drugs, or anything else really. I am just saying that if you dont have the life you want then there are small things you can do to change your life big time.
so this blog will be themed in self help, inspiration and a little of my own neurotic crap. ill have more stories, more concepts (some being very far from the others), and I will try to keep any of my own opinions that are imposing out. please give me feedback. take care

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